feel everything

can’t sleep. i wear a
horseshoe crab hat.
brain is stubble field.
hand gropes upward in
a dark not dark enough.

because

because because because

because i must 
re-inhabit force-feeding.
fear of cold tile.
bare bulbs

—see?
this isn’t real yet.
vivid language is bullshit.  
it isn’t what i felt…feel...

there is one true place.
it starts with gulping cry
and wakes the neighbors
and goes on and on...

howls without language.
rages without syntax.
goes on until I tear my throat.  
burns incendiary. lasts forever.

whatever words come along for the ride
are the only true words, the ones
i want to outrun, try to never say. 
want you to get by osmosis.

all my florid word art outlines what’s real—
do you feel how the empty shape fills?
do you see what i won’t say?

well. i can’t cut it anymore.
here it is

[ hour of howl ]

mommy daddy how could you?

[ wet ropy wet ]

no one rescued me

[ break everything in reach ]

i felt you daddy every blow every belt every slap every cruel word 
i pretended numb because you needed me to but
i felt it all
I FEEL EVERYTHING NOW

[ don’t want to be here anymore ]

goat costume
i rise
 

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Tuesday, September 26, 2017

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fine art prints
writing by Greg Correll